Here is a confession: as someone who had seen much of the world, if I haven’t been to a country, I probably could not place it on a map. My geographical brain is challenged that way. So I had no idea where Rwanda was specifically located, only that it was on the continent of Africa. I also had no idea that this country would embody ideas that have become close to my heart: inclusiveness, permaculture and sustainability.

The capital of Kigali would be the starting point of our trip, then onto Volcanoes National Park to see the Silverback gorillas. We checked into The Retreat at Heaven, suggested to us by Indagare.com - my favorite travel website. The Retreat was opened by Americans who have lived and worked in Kigali for 15 years - The Ruxins. Josh Ruxin wrote an incredible book (A Thousand Hills to Heaven - a must read ) about the Millennium Village in Rwanda and his efforts to affect sustainable change to a community by instituting health services, school systems and agricultural practices that would transform the lives of impoverished people there and make them independent. He has now gone on to create a chain of GoodLife pharmacies throughout East Africa. His wife Alissa joined him on the journey and ended up creating one of the top restaurants (Heaven) in Kigali, a boutique hotel (also called Heaven), and then she added the chic, eco-friendly addition to the Hotel (The Retreat at Heaven).

Room at The Retreat : With local fabrics, photos and handmade eco-friendly super-comfy beds from London.

We stayed 3 nights in preparation for the main event. Acclimating to the altitude (over 5,000 ft) was the most significant obstacle we had to overcome according to our travel agent, especially now that we live at sea level In Tel Aviv. The second, I would call it a challenge, was to be able to walk at a 15+ incline on the treadmill for at least 15-30 minutes. While hiking up into the forest was not at a fast pace, you didn’t want to fall behind or hold-up the group. A and I worked out for several months trying to get our stamina up to 15+ on the treadmills and ellipticals, and could only deal with the altitude issue by spending more time in, well, altitude. So we hoped the 4 nights before the first trek would be sufficient to adapt. Since Rwanda is known as the ‘Land of a Thousand Hills’ we had plenty of opportunities to walk up and down them.

We had dinner on our first night at Heaven. It was a lovely meal with less than perfect martinis, to be expected in Africa I suppose. After dinner there was an interruption in the service, while several waiters raced around the dining area in a comedic way to loud music stopping at each table to present a cake with a torch coming out of it. ‘It must be someones birthday’ I said to A. When they finally landed at our table with the cake, which said ‘Happy Birthday Avram’ we were both surprised. Even though his birthday was 4 days away, It didn’t register to me that the cake could actually be for him.

The next morning after breakfast we met our driver and guide Charles to begin our tour of Kigali. We started at the “Hotel Mille Collines” (better known as Hotel Rwanda). As you will notice it looks nothing like hotel used in the film. Charles told us “Hotel Rwanda is a Hollywood story” and that “the guy in the film is not a good guy, and was not the manager of the hotel, he was a waiter who somehow ended up with the keys.” Apparently he took money from the people desperate to be hidden, not from the hotel safe, and not from the goodness of his heart, but for profit. The fact that he currently lives in Belgium, says something. I just Wiki’ed that, and there is a controversy - but it doesn’t seem as extreme as Charles describes it. But then again, to be a Rwandan that survived the genocide - opinions will tend to be strong.

Hotel Rwanda set from the film, borrowed from Vincent Moloi — Hotel Rwanda set from the film, borrowed from **Vincent Moloi**

The real Hotel Rwanda or Hotel Mille Collines

We drove through the crowded streets of downtown to watch business people doing there ‘busy-ness’ as Charles called it. He told us that Rwanda is the cleanest country in Africa, which we had also heard last night from both our waiter and the bartender. Apparently the Rwandan government has mandated that on the last Saturday of each month everyone in their home district is required to clean the streets from 8am - 12pm. Everyone. No work, no play, just cleaning together. They are incredibly proud of this, and it really is amazing how clean all of Rwanda is - even in the countryside. You will see Graffiti on buildings, people smoking, but not one piece of paper, not one leaf, not one cigarette butt on the ground. Even the dirt roads in the country seem to be dust free. I imagine that knowing you will have to clean your community at the end of the month helps you to maintain a certain level of cleanliness so when that that Saturday comes your job is much easier. This makes littering a no-brainer.

The Rwandan government has also been plastic bag free since 2008! How many years have we Americans struggled just to remember to bring our own bags to the market? The newest idea from the government is on the second Saturday of each month, to make Kigali’s main roads car-free until noon, so people can use the normally congested roads to exercise - run, ride bikes, whatever. While this is challenging for businesses (no workers) or people trying to get across town in a car (for brunch or an appointment), the citizens will benefit from the freedom to have the streets car-free and be able to workout.

Charles drove us through the ‘coolest’ neighborhood in Kigali called Nyamirambo. This is where the nightlife of Kigali is, and during the day there are many colorful small shops, tailors, and mosques. This is also a place we were able to see the ‘cleanest city in Africa’ at work. No trash anywhere!

There is a great deal of traffic and so Rwandans have developed a unique moto-taxi service. Motorcyclists carry a second helmet so you can just jump on and be taken to your destination.

Our next stop was the Genocide Museum. Since I am not a history buff either, I didn’t know much about the genocide, except for the very little I learned from watching the film back in 2004. It was shocking to actually understand that the Hutus and Tutsis were all living together and that the conflict was invented by the Belgians colonizing Rwanda in 1932. They instituted an identity card which would classify a Rwandan as either a Hutu or a Tutsi. There was a very simple designation to pit one tribe against the other - if you had more than 10 cows you were a Tutsi, less than 10 cows a Hutu. In the 1990s the Tutsi were put into power - the 1% Tutsi controlling the 80+% Hutu. In 1994 when the President of Rwanda’s plane was shot down - the Hutu rebels used it as an opportunity to begin the Genocide and massacre the Tutsi.

It was neighbors killing neighbors, mixed families killing family, with the only weapons they could get their hands on - Machetes. Brutal murders of people that were once friends and/or relatives. And to think that this took place less than 25 years ago.

The museum had mass burial sites where the remains of more the 250,000 Rwandans were buried, a wall with names engraved, a pictorial tour of the events leading up to the genocide, and a few beautiful stained glass windows in remembrance of those brutally murdered. After the Genocide where almost one million Tutsis were killed, the perpetrators (the Hutus) were allowed to confess or go to prison. Those that confessed would serve half of their time then be able to return to their communities to serve those they committed crimes against. They would help to re-build housing, protect the elderly and to help take care of those families whose relatives they murdered. Remarkably, they were welcomed back into those communities - an incredible act of forgiveness and inclusion.

In my research about Rwanda (or really any country) I usually end up with a list of things to see and do that are NOT on our official itinerary. This tends to be unsettling for the guides, as i am always changing their daily plans. For a break from the heaviness of the Genocide Museum, we drove over to the (off tour) Kimironko Market. Vegetables, Fruits, Eggs, African Fabrics, Soccer shirts, - all an incredible display of color. To visit local markets, or any kind of food emporium, I feel like you get a sense of life in that city by being among the locals shopping for their necessities.

I had also read about a new small batch producer of Rwandan coffee, called Question Coffee in Gishushu. They have great branding, a well-designed modern cafe with an outdoor patio, and they offer classes in production, roasting and brewing. We stopped for a delicious coffee break and I bought a few bags of Q Coffee to bring back to LA. I met Dan, who was excited to show me their facilities. I asked him where he studied the coffee making process and was surprised when he said Blue Bottle in San Francisco and Intelligentsia Coffee in Oakland. Coincidence? I find this happens all the time when traveling….

After a relaxing afternoon and a massage at the Hotel, we had another dinner at Heaven - with drinks and appetizers beforehand with the owners. During our conversation we discovered we had some very good friends living in NYC in common. Because of our upcoming adventure, I asked if they had been to see the Gorillas, and they had a few stories. One about a German man who, wanting a to get a better photograph, tried to get the Silverbacks attention by throwing a rock at him. The Gorilla subsequently ripped the Germans arm off. Josh also had a personal story about he and his mom being charged by a Silverback, but it was just a display of superiority. He did offer one piece of advice which I really took to heart. Put down your camera and be with them. Observe them and savor your time with them.

When our pre-dinner martinis arrived, and we were obviously not pleased, Alissa decided to use this as a ‘teaching moment’ and video taped A giving a martini-making lesson to the bartenders. This paid off for the next few days!

When we started planning our trip to Rwanda in September 2017, we mentioned to a few friends in Tel Aviv that we would be going. Magically (or, not) during the coming weeks and months, all things ‘Rwandan’ kept coming up in conversation. We were invited to dinner at a friends house with the Rwandan Ambassador to Israel. We learned from a friend about an on-going irrigation project that Israel was doing with Rwanda. We talked with a woman from Silicon Valley whose friend started a scholarship fund for young girls in Rwanda called komera.org. Girls usually have no opportunity to go to school unless they are sponsored. So to add to our ‘Brangelina’ like brood of kids we are sponsoring at University, we decided to sponsor Sarah - a very bright junior high school student who wants to study history and economics, and hopes to become a lawyer.

On our second day in Kigali we dedicated the day to Sarah, traveling to the eastern countryside to meet her and see the school. The drive was interesting - to see the contrast between the city and the lush agricultural areas, every bit as clean as the city streets. Donald Trump had just made a comment about the “Shit holes of Africa” - and really? Rwanda couldn’t be any further from that description. Trump could also take a few pages from the Rwandan Governments implementation of infrastructure. Since it is the ‘Land of a Thousand Hills’ they have introduced a carefully thought through development of roadside architecture that is planted to retain the hillside, to utilize terracing and to strategically place drainage pipes that flow into a series of deep trenches for water catchment on either side of the road. The roads themselves are beautifully manicured, roundabouts with Cicads, Agaves, varieties of tropical plants and palms. I find the word “Shithole” to be more fitting for Donald Trump’s lying, filthy mouth.

After a 2 hour drive we arrived at the Kayonza Modern School. We met the Principal, the local women from komera.org and our sponsoree Sarah. We toured the school and saw the dorms, library and cafeteria. While Sarah missed her family, she was happy for the opportunity to be educated, which made us happy to be able to help.

The staff or Komera and Kayonza and sarah

The womans dorm is really one massive room filled with wire-framed bunkbeds side by side.

The Cafeteria. Each table is set with lunch, this ‘Rwandan’ porridge-like staple was the first dish they brought out.

On the way back to Kigali we stopped at Khana Khazana Kiyovu a local Indian restaurant for lunch near the hotel. This confirmed for us what most advice claims - Heaven is the best restaurant in Kigali.

The next morning as we collected our bags to check out, I noticed our cottage was called ‘Umuhate’ which means ‘Courage’ in Kinyarwanda - the language of Rwanda. It struck me that this is something we will most definitely need to have in the Volcanoes National Park, especially when coming face to face with the Silverback gorillas and their families.